I miss her. I miss being loved by her. Without her love, my faults have merciless clarity. I couldn't help but notice that, in the book of Genesis, God makes an observational statement, "It is not good that the man be alone". Ah, yes, I get that. Well, what do I expect after living in a spoiled-brat marriage? It wasn't just a good marriage, it was a fantasy marriage. Really. Half my life was spent with her. The other half was simply growing up, so pretty much all my adult life was spent at her side. The shock value of her being gone doesn't subside quickly. It's more than simply being lonely. Lonely would be like wishing you could have a violin to play, but not having one. This is knowing you once had a Stradivarius.
You know how, at a potluck, you have you eye on a particularly good-looking apple pie there with the desserts, but once you get over with your plate to get a piece, it's all gone?
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