It's been a little over a year since my Beloved traveled on to the next life, living me behind. After I short while after she was gone, I began to watch romantic films. Exclusively. A year of this and I found myself asking, rightfully, "Why, why Bob do you do this?" After the ponderings in answer to this question, I realized that I was trying to fill the void in the only way I could find to do so. I don't want to be entertained anymore, life is just too sacred to waste my time doing that, but romance films: for me that is something else. I loved being in love. I loved belonging to that someone that made me feel I had such incredible value, someone whose opinion mattered to me more than anyone else's. She made being me something good. Now I have a cat that loves me. Not quite the same. So into this gaping hole in my life I dump romantic films. What else am I going to do? Who could forget those immortal words, "It is not good for man to be alone". Yeah, I totally get that. Even though I know that God loves me beyond my comprehension, still, the love of a woman. . . Now that my Stradivarius has been taken from me, well, there is no replacing it, and the astonishing one-of-a-kind beauty of it haunts me constantly.
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